The Love of Women

davidandjonathon“I grieve for you, Jonathan my brother; you were very dear to me.  Your love for me was wonderful, more wonderful than that of women.”  2 Samuel 1:26

Soon to be King David, upon hearing of the death of Jonathan, the son of Saul, and the one with whom his soul had been knit by the Lord, said something about the love that they had shared. What finally struck me after many years of thinking about their clarion love and connection was that the love they shared was better than the “love of women”.

This is not about how men love women nor is it about gay males. No it is about a much greater love than that. This is about the way that women love. These were two valiant warriors, yet where love was concerned they did not love one another as might be expected in some Good Ole boys club kind of a way. No this invites us to take another look at the way that women love.

Ultimately all those who are found in Christ are in Him and He in them as being His bride. There is a quality of love found in women that is very rarely found in men. This passage from the Old Testament is rare if not unique, and demands that we, as men take another look at how we love.

It is enough that David has put it this way, without me trying to expound on the difference. I leave it to you to contemplate what this must mean. Perhaps if we once understood it, we would leave off from our heavy-handed male lover roles, and find ourselves moving toward this truly amazing kind of love that is found in the hearts of women.

Lord, help us to melt into this feminine way of loving in time so that the world might “know.”


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7 Responses to The Love of Women

  1. jimpuntney says:

    Jay, This topic is one very dear to me. As we search together the riches of Christ we begin to see that ‘in’ our new identity Paul lays out a profound statement.

    “There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

    This is in harmony with the words of Jesus when He was questioned about marriage in the Kingdom.

    “So tell us, whose wife will she be in the resurrection? For all seven were married to her.”

    As we enter the depth and beauty of Christ we see that natural barriers are vanquished, what seemed to insurmountable differences in the flesh are no more. This is indeed a process, yet I do believe our brother Jamal has summed this up rather well.

    “True intimate relationships among a family of people (church) regardless of gender, age, economic status, etc… is possible in the Spirit.” ~ Jamal Jivanjee

    “The ‘oneness’ Jesus prayed His community would experience in John 17 goes beyond simply getting along. It’s about deep relational communion.” ~ Jamal Jivanjee

    The Lord has been revealing to me of late the significance of the term ‘Woman’ in regard to scripture.

    Here is a link to my post about this topic.

    Once again grace and peace to your and yours my brother!

  2. jimpuntney says:

    Reblogged this on Treasure in Jars of Clay and commented:
    At “Loving Like God” Jay Ferris helps us to better understand relational love.

  3. Maidena says:

    I’ve always sympathized with men and the difficulty they must have with being intimate with Jesus. Truly God wants men to tap in to their feminine side and learn to love like a woman, because they are His Bride. I suppose that’s why I’m single….haven’t met a man that can truly love a woman as Christ loved the Church. Papa’s still healing me in that area…thinking about that, I realize I have a greater intimacy with God, as Father, than I do, Jesus, as Bridegroom…..hmmm….

  4. Markus says:

    My dear brother, Michael Clark, linked me to your blog and post, Jim, just we have an exchange about the same topic :-D!
    I so love your last words here:
    Lord, help us to melt into this feminine way of loving in time so that the world might “know.”

    … and want to add my words I wrote to Mike some days before I saw yours:
    I learned to love Him the “woman way”… and it’s such a delight! What a blessing God made women!!!

    Blessings from my heart!

  5. Paul Rodgers says:

    I have been confounded by the inability of men in the church to be intimate. I struggle to find fellowship among men. They get very awkward when you get too close in the Spirit. But I don’t hold this against them because I know what it took to free me. God jerked my rug-of-life out from under me, delivering a divine man-crushing blow that broke me from my machismo! I thank Him daily for it, because it was a horrible bondage to be in. Yes it still pops up, but it is only for a very short and unwelcomed visit as an aggressive alien from another world.

  6. Pam says:

    Jay once told a story about a men’s meeting he was in. They were all sitting around in a living room setting talking about intimacy. More from a safe, doctrinal standpoint I got the impression. Well Jay was sitting next to a man, and he began to lean into him. Slowly, crouching, inch by inch, until he was laying his head on the man’s shoulder. The man got all frozen up and didn’t know how to react, and of course the faces on all the others had to have been priceless too! :) I love this story and imagine it’s yours too. It was a woman that washed and kissed Jesus feet, but at the first, it should have been a man. Jesus said of this man, “I was your guest, and you did not wash my feet”.

    Similar looks must have been on the faces when Jesus did the intimate job of washing his disciple’s feet!

  7. Paul Rodgers says:

    Oh, that is hilarious about Jay! You are so right! Jesus did say it should’ve been a man. And I can imagine too the looks on their faces as Jesus caressed their feet! I love it!

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